I Hate Tony

This is Mackenzie's response to Tony's beautiful haikus about his love for her:

I hate you so much
If I could kill you, I would
God you make me sick.

Tony is a jerk
He likes to beat up children
What is his problem?

Man, you're a weirdo
How am I like a large rock?
I feel insulted.

Dear Lacey

I love you so much. You are the best dog ever, and you are always so happy to see me. It makes me so happy to come home and see you waiting for me, and how you wiggle your whole body because you are wagging your tail so hard. I love how your face is so wrinkly and you always look like you're melting when you're tired. I also love you are so sturdy and I can lie down on top of you without worrying about squishing you. You always want to make me happy and you know when you've done something wrong. Even when you get into the trash I still love you because you look so sad and guilty, and I feel bad. You are so spoiled and you can get a treat just by making a sad face with all your wrinkly skin, and Dad is such a sucker when it comes to giving you things, but you are so cute that we can't help it. You are such a great guard dog, and I always feel safe because you are so strong that I know you could take down anyone who was trying to hurt us. Even though you go crazy and bark at everyone walking by outside, it's reassuring to know that you are protecting to house. I love you so much and you are the best dog that anyone could ever ask for.

Yeah, I just wrote a wall of text about my dog. You wish you were as cool as me.

Thoughts on Macbeth

So, we started reading Macbeth for class. I don't think its too bad, the language isn't too hard to understand. Of course, little is for a genius like me. Anyways, I think its not a bad story, its kind of dark and violent, but I think that makes it more interesting than something like a Shakespearian romance would be. I like reading Macbeth a lot more than Romeo and Juliet and a Midsummer Night's Dream, and the audio recording helps a lot too in understanding it.

Geoffrey Chaucer

Righto, for our latest blog post, I'm supposed to post some interesting facts about the author Geoffrey Chaucer, whose best known work is The Canterbury Tales. He was very influential and made a crucial contribution to English literature, according to the internet, so I guess he's a pretty cool guy despite being named Geoffrey. So here's some delicious copypasta with meatballs about the fabulous author, Geoffrey Chaucer! Hehe, that kinda ryhmes.:

-Geoffrey Chaucer was born in London
-He was the son of a prosperous wine merchant and deputy to the king's butler, and his wife Agnes.
-Between 1367 and 1378 Chaucer made several journeys abroad on diplomatic and commercial missions.
-He wrote in English during a time that most writing was in Latin. Aww yeah, sticking it to the man, 1300's style.
-In 1359-1360 Chaucer went to France with Edward III's army during the Hundred Years' War. He was captured in the Ardennes and returned to England after the treaty of Brétigny in 1360, because the enemy were unable to stand his awesomeness. So he's also a fierce war hero, what a great guy!
-Chaucer did not begin working on The Canterbury Tales until he was in his early 40s.
-According to tradition, Chaucer died in London on October 25, 1400. He was buried in Westminster Abbey, in the part of the church, which afterwards came to be called Poet's Corner. Even has a corner named for him, man this guy rules!
-Chaucer took his narrative inspiration for his works from several sources but still remained an entirely individual poet, gradually developing his personal style and techniques.

I have also provided a picture of his glorious, beautiful face at the top for all the ladies to drool over. Aren't I the best blogger in the world?

In conclusion, Geoffrey Chaucer was an awesome, powerful, genius, handsome, brilliant, strong, and wise guy. I believe that we have found our new Chuck Norris.

Writing

We're supposed to write about how we have changed and improved as writers since freshman year, as Mr. Lunn says that we will never master writing. Now, I beg to differ with that assessment, as I am first and foremost master of everything in the universe and completely perfect at everything I attempt, but I want the points, so oh well. Right, struggles. My struggles as a writer are basically the same then as now. I have a lot of trouble thinking of words or examples. Sometimes, I will come up with a great idea or word, and then forget it a minute later. Sometimes, I'll think that I explained something well or did something right, only to be deducted points for being unclear. Many times when writing a paper, I just completely misunderstand what the paper is supposed to be about and I'll have to rewrite a lot of it, which gets really annoying. I tend to have trouble writing essays, but I think I do much better at writing stories and such, where I don't have to follow such rigorous guidelines and can be more creative. Whenever I have to write stories for standardized tests, I do really well. It's kind of weird and confusing since teachers are always saying that they grade what the standardized tests will grade like, but I'll do much better on standardized tests than the class essays. I might get a B or C on a paper I turn in, and then I'll get a perfect score on my OGT essays or something. I got an almost perfect score on the writing PSAT, I only missed on multiple choice question or something. Sometimes, I really do like writing stories, but essays are where I have serious issues. I hope this post isn't to late, it's almost 1 on Sunday and I just remembered to do this. I think I'm going to go to bed.

Oh right, quote. Here you go, fresh from Google.

A critic can only review the book he has read, not the one which the writer wrote. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

I'd say thats a pretty insightful quote, don't you think?

My amazingly fantastic Beowulf Comic

I'd better prepare my award speech for my Nobel Prize in literature, my Caldecott Medal, and my Best Writing-Adapted Screenplay Oscar, because here it is, folks! Alanna Bowman's Beowulf Comic! Woohoo! A meticulous reimagining of the classic epic, adapted suitably for a modern audience, this is a tale of bravery, sacrifice, strength, and dragons. DRAGONS, people! I couldn't get more epic if I tried.

Beowulf Comic by areneeb123 | Make Your Own At www.toondoo.com

Why bridges and monster trucks? ...Why not?! I like being an individual, which can help you go a long way in today's society. Besides, I didn't like the pre-loaded drawings on that site.

Oh, and apparently the last blog post was supposed to be about heroes. That's fine, writing about myself should still suffice, seeing as how I am most definitely a hero to many, many people. Including myself. Hooray for modesty!

My Second Post

I sure hope that this can live up to the wild standards that were set by my first post. Right, so it's about 4 AM or so and my crippling insomnia means that I have nothing to do when I remembered that I'm supposed to have a blog post by Sunday. Hope it's not too late. So...not sure what to post. What have I been doing lately? Going...to..school...yeah. Oh, I'm taking a rock climbing class! That's pretty cool. Hurts your arms, but its a great workout. Anything else? Mostly just cleaning up the house, sleeping, eating, the usual. I can't really remember what's going on on Monday. Oh wait, I just realized I just had to write another speech for Banned Books! Aaaahh! I'm screwed, I have no idea what to write about. A 'personal informative speech'? WHAT IS THAT?! How can you talk about your own personal experiences and make them informative too? I mean, would you say "Three days ago, my grandfather and I went fishing. My grandfather was born in 1928, in southern Virginia. His first job was working in the coal mines, where he made a modest income. He eventually met his wife, my grandmother Margaret, and moved to Ohio, where he has resided to this day. His story inspired me to never give up and believe in the power or dreams and friendship and love and hard work. The end." I mean, if it were just a personal speech, or an information speech, I'd be fine. But a personal informative speech is just ludicrous. Oh well, I'll figure out something. After all, I am Alanna Bowman, destroyer of worlds and eater of children.

My First Post

This will go down as one of the best moments of 2010. Alanna Bowman's FIRST BLOG POST! I'm not sure what I'm supposed to write, so I'm just going to ramble for a little bit. This blog is for Mr. Lunn's English class, for you millions of fans who are not Mr. Lunn that are wondering why I started this. Well, since the person sitting next to me just said that we are supposed to write about ourselves, I'll write about myself. Right now, I'm really tired, hungry, and I'm writing a blog. I like music, cooking, art, and sleeping. I like eating cupcakes, fried rice, chocolate, and children. I like reading for fun, but I haven't been able to read much lately because I've been so busy. I like English classes, but I don't like writing essays because I normally take a forever to do them and end up redoing things over and over, so they become very tedious. I don't mind school overall, I mean, I'd rather be doing other things, but I don't hate it with every fiber of my being. Some classes are better than others. The bell is about to ring, so I'll have to continue this masterpiece of online writing another time.